Drought in the Garden (E.O.L.)

14 04 2014

 They say that the seed you water is the one that grows.

This is true, and leads me to ask the question,

What have you planted? What are you watering?

Where are you spending your energy?

Have you tilled the land sufficiently?

Are you using organic seeds or GMOs?

Have you saturated the ground with the crap you have been through, for growth?

Or do you still carry that manure in a bag strapped to your shoulders?

Would you rather wait for Him to Make it Rain,

Before you show signs of movement in the soil?

or do you regularly soak the seed?

How often do you check the growth?

Do you neglect the plant after it sprouts,

Busy checking on the growth of other vegetation that does not offer sustenance?

Do you plant, looking to foster the growth of this herb until something better comes along?

And if something else sprouts fast, how do you know that isn’t just a weed,

Soaking up all the nutrients from the ground for its own agenda,

Never giving back to you the farmer,

Destined to shrivel up and die and leave the earth barren?

Why did you plant this seed in the first place if you knew that you did not have the patience to help it grow?

There are starving people elsewhere living in places

Where the ground is no longer yield a crop.

You are fortunate to have a healthy, good seed,

Which is ready to produce a healthy good plant,

The foundation for a healthy good harvest.

But you would rather focus on weeds

Of no medicinal or nutritional value.

Oh yes, it may be a beautiful rose.

But besides the smell and appearance, what else can it do for you?

It can’t feed you. It can’t cloth you.

It can’t heal you.

It only caters to your ego.

Is that the plant you want to water? Is this what you want to grow?

And how do you know that this plant won’t eventually trump the beauty of that rose?

What did you plant here that ruined this soil?

Why is it so difficult to just be in the moment,

And allow this beautiful plant to grow?


(Notes) – Dealing With A Broken Soul (Part 2) – 7 Steps to Grieving Process

19 07 2011

In order to grow, no matter whatever is bothering us, we must go through a grieving process.

The issue is never starting it, it is COMPLETING IT.

Complete the process and grow

incomplete process = being STUCK

7 Steps:

1. Name your pain. – What happened?  What did it cost you?  You can’t rebuke everything is Jesus name.  Some things are placed in your face for you to work through to get you to a better place.

2. Grieve your loss.  You can’t heal without it.

3.  Try on your offenders shoes.  Everything about them.  Deep meditation on this point.

4. What pearls came out of your pain?  You become better because of the pain you went through.

5.  Journal your feelings.  Get the pain out of your system.  Even if you have to write a letter to the person who offended you and not send it, do it for the sake of getting the pain out of your system.

6. Release your offender.  Give up the right for revenge or anger.  Untie the knot.

7.  Reach out to your offender.  Forgiveness heals.


(Notes) – Dealing With A Broken Soul (Part 1)

19 07 2011

re: Stuck seminar – 2008

Past Hurt causes one to focus on the pain, and not God

It Follows one

Emotionally Unhealthy

Makes one Unproductive

God can heal your past and bless your future

Your history need not hinder your future

God can allow us to see the past but forget the pain

Read Genesis Chapter 41

Manasseh – (God made me forget all my misery)

Ephraim – (God has mad me fruitful in the land of my affliction)

Forget and be fruitful

The solution is growth

Growth happens in the valleys, not on the mountain tops

You cant grow if its everyone elses fault

victims never grow

Rant # 112,354 REVISED

14 07 2010

1. I can’t stand the snow.  I don’t understand people who live in the north and dealing with it all the time.  (Still Agree)

2. For some dumb reason I went to Syracuse. (Everything happens for a reason)

3. I am quite fortunate to know the people I know in the industry. (What industry?  Stop acting like there is only one.)

4. For good and bad reasons, they are why I wont put out my music for mass consumption.

5. If you want to hear it just ask.  Maybe I will say, “sure listen…”

6. Bacon  (Turkey Bacon to be Exact)

7. I hate being in debt.

8. #6 was for my roommate’s son.  (If you don’t understand, you wont)

9. I remember why I used to play video games without pause.  Now I pause before playing any game. (I still play from time to time.)

10. Books are so much more rewarding.

11. I am a firm believer in reading books and taking notes on what was read like it was class or something.  You get so much more out of it.

12. Everyone needs to read Ishmael by Daniel Quinn.

13. Even after reading it, nobody will do anything to help “the situation.”

14. I love my attitude on life.  It’s what got me to where I am today.  If it intimidates you, then you need to become a stronger person or get away from me.  I am not changing for anyone.

15. “we don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are…” – Shi Yan Ming

16. If I walked up to you, hardly knowing you, and told you to cut your hair because you look ugly, would you?

17. Lying to people only makes things worse for them.  Its selfish.

18. Public Gyms have way too much eye candy.

19. I wonder how much brain candy is in them.  (like I really give a care…)  (Gotta go somewhere else for that.)

20.I remember when people didn’t curse so damn much… lol

21. I actually wish that people as a whole didn’t.  Its about being more articulate. (I need to follow this advice.)

22. What the hell ever…

23. I have a list of 76 qualities I am looking for in a life partner. (Its now up to 78)

24. If a woman can hit 80% on that list, she is worth being talking to.

25. If she can maintain 80%, then she is worth being with.

26. After a while, she naturally becomes my 100%.  (awwwww…)

27. I’m not going to talk about the friend I have that is currently at 93%, because y’all will ask me the obvious question.  (The more I spoke with this friend, the more I realized that she was actually more like a 54%.  lol… Thank God that didn’t work.)

28. No its not Yvette.  I refuse to rate her.  (ewwww… that family for real…)

29. Most UFC fighters are average at best.

30. The best have admirable skill.

31. I would love to spar against Brock Lesner.  A man of his high skill level is truly an anomaly and worth testing one’s skill against.

32. I often fight to the level of my competition, unless they are ridiculously below me.

33. I will be this age in a month. (Not anymore.  Currently this age)

34. I may continue this later…

35.  I have reached a higher understanding of myself and placement in this world.

36.  People don’t bother me as much as they used to anymore.

37.  If they are supposed to be in my life, they will be.  If not, they won’t be.

38.  I learned to accept that and its a great feeling.

39.  One year ago exactly, someone I wanted in my life walked out of it.  It hurt me badly.

40.  I am happy now, and have accepted that the person did not care enough to have me in their life and thus did not deserve me in their life.

41.  I am thankful and celebrate the lives of those that want me and have me in their life.

42.  I know the degrees of this vary, and I accept that too, which is why I wont get mad at flake y people any more.

43.  Its nice to feel free of all boundaries.

44. I knew I would come back to this rant again.  There wont be a revision to this one again.

Be Healthy!

2 03 2010

I write this with hopes and prayers that the people who read this either take this to heart, think about it or already live a lifestyle that follows in suit.

Keith Elam, otherwise known as Guru from the legendary rap group Gangstarr was recently in a coma and had to undergo surgery for a heart attack he suffered.  He is only 43 years old.  This hits me so hard because I literally grew up listening to this brother, as Gangstarr is one of my favorite groups.  The thought of this positive man leaving us so young made me reflect on my own father who passed only months shy of his 70th birthday.

I immediately thought of the state of healthy that both were or may have been in.  My father did not exercise at all.  No, he was not fat and flabby, but that does not mean that he was in peak shape.  I do not know what kind of exercise regiment or diet Guru had, so I can not speak about his health but what I can say is that 43 is too young for a man to leave us, and I am grateful that he is still here.  As with all trials that came in his life, I am sure this will make him a stronger man in the future, and hopefully more health conscious.  He has a second chance.

As humans, in our most natural state, we are not supposed to live a sedentary lifestyle.  We are naturally hunter/gatherers.  This society we are in forced us into this through technology and laws.  Then we wonder why we have such a high percentage of “heart disease.”  Since we do not hunt and gather anymore, make sure you get your NECESSARY allowance of activity in.  This is what we NATURALLY as humans do, as opposed to sitting around.

In addition, this past saturday I asked my nephew what the purpose of food was.  At first, he couldn’t give me the correct answer.  I understood exactly why because most humans in our society don’t know the answer anymore readily.  Before you continue reading, answer the question for yourself.


Think you got it?  Good.

The answer is, to nourish and energize the body.  The foods that will give us the best nourishment and energy are the ones we should eat obviously.  With that said, answer this.

What is the point of Chocolate Cake?

Think about it for a while.  I am sure if my 12 year old nephew got the point immediately, then you will too.

There are so many foods these days which are made solely for the purpose of taste with no other purpose that it is absurd.  Why eat something that wont help you grow as a person?  Ok, I wont sit here and crucify you for eating pie, but at the very least, can you think about keeping “The Temple” in tip top shape through your diet?  We need YOU (yes, YOU!) around!  Besides, there are plenty of meals that taste amazing which are good for you.

I implore you to think about your health.  In reality, it is one of the few possessions you will have for the rest of your life.  May as well take care of it.

Get well Guru!  You will survive yet another moment of truth!